I used to force myself to fuck my husband, now he blows my fucking mind!

I’ve been with him since I was 16. We knew after less than a month we were going to spend forever together. I would do absolutely anything for him, and he would for me as well.

But (there’s always a but…) He’s always had a very high sex drive, and I never really did, even when we were teens. Probably around age 20 I stopped having any sex drive at all. I love him more than life itself, partially because he never once pressured me to do anything I didn’t want to do. He knew what a struggle my sex drive was for me and was always so much more than happy to cuddle instead of sex. But I knew he wanted more.

So I started planning my weekends around making myself have sex. He is extremely generous in the bedroom, and, even though I never walked away without climaxing, I still didn’t enjoy it as much as I should have. I started thinking about sex as something I was doing for him instead of with him. And I did it for a long time because I wanted so desperately to make him happy.

A year and a half ago it all came to a head. I was dipping deep into depression and we talked about it a lot. About my depression, about feeling like sex was a chore, about how he definitely knew I felt it was a chore. How he felt so unwanted and unloved because I never wanted to fuck him. About how we needed to figure out something different. I used to cry a lot after sex, because I wanted to want sex. I wanted to want it so badly it hurt. I did still love pleasing him, and I did enjoy orgasm. But getting there was not what I wanted. So I cried a lot before and after sex. And it ruined the mood instantly, because he would always stop and make sure I am okay. Like I said. We would do anything for each other.

So I did several things. I started working out more consistently, including going on lots of bike rides with him. I stopped hormonal birth control (and used spermicide. we weren’t about to bring a child into an unsteady relationship).

It got better, but only barely.

The thing that actually revolutionized our sex lives: I tried weed for the first time at 28, about a year ago. It hadn’t been legal until recently, and my religious and strict upbringing, I had never tried it. But I finally convinced myself I would be okay if I legally ingested weed as a full adult. Wild how I needed to talk myself up to do a legal thing, but that’s not a sex story.

It was a complete 180, almost instantly. I had not been horny in years. A decade maybe. And the first time I had an edible, we fucked twice in one night after work. I cried, and for once it wasn’t an instant mood killer…well it kind of was at first but we cuddled and kissed until I could explain it wasn’t like it had been. I wasn’t sad, I was horny for the first time in years. I laughed, kissed me, and slipped back inside me. We finished, went back to the TV, and then fucked again later that night.

Since then we’ve gone from sex barely once a week to 5-6 times a week for the last 9 or so months. This week we’ve been at it twice a day, all week long. This morning I woke him up by touching him, and he’s about half an hour from coming home again and fucking me absolutely senseless. He’s always been extremely unselfish in bed but recently he’s made an absolute meal of my clit every night. I see stars when he’s inside me. He can melt me with a single touch. I crave him more than I’ve ever craved anything. Sex with him is magical, every cliche you’ve ever heard. Like absolutely nothing I’ve ever felt. Climaxes that last 10-15 minutes, no exaggeration. I’m literally dripping right now waiting for him to come home, fuck.

EDIT: have a fun update for y’all here if you care, but he did just come home and I sucked the most magnificent dick in the world and swallowed each and every drop. He’s fucking delicious. After I’d had him and he’d had me, he fucked me against the wall for the second time